One way or the other, the society affects our lives. The society is a force that we allow to shape our lives through trends and patterns, what is and what’s not attainable, through agreed social norms and other factors too numerous to mention.

The society tells us what is acceptable and what is not, what kind of dressings are required for what occasions, and what kinds are out rightly unsuitable and out of date and fashion. The society even influences our choice of words. It also lets us know what is cool and what is uncool at any given time, and the way the definition of cool changes, is one thing that would always amaze me.

I mean there was a time taking a picture mandated you to pose and look chill, but now taking a picture means you have to reveal the depths of your tongue, do funny things with your fingers, and make sure you are not standing well. lol. This is the new definition of cool; thanks to the society.

What’s my point exactly? Our lives are actually influenced largely by what the society permits or forbids, what the society exalts or demeans, and this is because we have permitted it to, and we permit it to, because the consequence of refusing to let the society play a role in our lives is…

Not just easy (I am still contemplating whether it is actually possible)

To show you the power that the society wields over us, many of us grow up seeing some norms and tenets around us, and we do not question it, or wonder why it’s there, because to us, it has always been that way, and that’s just how things are done.

Now I am not stating that all of these norms and tenets are negative (although some are), but the fact that we are not interested in understanding its origins or reasons for practice, shows us how much trust we have put into the society.

To us right now, we do not bother with explanations into why we do most of the things we do, and why it is in vogue or acceptable, instead we just do it because everybody does it, and there is safety in numbers.

What happens when these numbers are wrong?

To state as a matter of fact, I am not against these practices or any other “neutral” practice of the society in general, but what’s up with the strong faith?

We seem to have put much faith in the society that we intentionally choose to forfeit our rights to understanding motives behind a lot of practices, and instead we have sacrificed our free will to choice on the altar of  doing the “reigning things”, even when these reigning things are to our detriment.

To most of us, if this is how the society does it, then it is cool.

And that explains why people who go against the basic ideas of the society are considered rebellious,

Why? Because they go against what people are used to;

When someone is tagged as rebellious in this generation, it is no longer because the individual did anything abominable, but because the person is simply not doing what the society tells us to do, no matter what it is.

Simply put, rebellion, according to the dictionary of our generation, is trying to weave a different philosophy other than what is being preached on the TV, and read on the newspapers.

I think I’m still too far away from the ideal definition of rebellion in this society, so let me break it down some more.

Rebellion is not wearing what others are wearing, and not speaking in the same slang as others.

Rebellion is trying to write your examinations on your own, and not being involved in examination malpractice, AND NOT AGREEING TO TELL YOUR SEAT MATE THE ANSWER BECAUSE YOU BELIEVE THAT IT IS STILL AN ACT OF DISHONESTY!

Rebellion is trying to stay kept in a society that preaches glory in sexual experience outside the walls of marriage, even when premarital sex goes against your personal convictions.

Rebellion is not fretting over what you eat, because your weight is not a priority to you like many people expect it to be, and you have learned to love your body the way it is, even if it is without the delicate curves and hips, and muscles and abs that the society worships.

Rebellion is trying to pursue a career that doesn’t lead you to the altar when your parents are pastors.

Rebellion is not going to school  to study medicine and law when your results were very high

So to us, ‘rebellion’ has substituted the word ‘Different’, and believe me, that makes me want to rebel right now.

I wouldn’t have had a problem with the society though, if this was as far as it went, if the society only had a say in the mild things of life.

But what happens when we give the society more power over our lives than it is really is supposed to have?

What happens when we depend on the approval of the society to get confidence and self-esteem?

What happens when we allow the society to wield enough power to determine our joy, and our approach to life, and most importantly, what happens when we allow the society to affect how we look at ourselves?

Well. I wouldn’t also have been bothered with this level of trust in the society, if the society is how it is supposed to be.

If the society was still logical, and rational, if the society was still able to teach responsibility and modesty, truth and compassion, intelligence, and natural beauty, then I, and every other concerned individual would have been able to relapse back into our chairs, breathe a deep sigh of relief, and tell ourselves; at least we are under safe guidance.

But when you look at the society as of now, and you listen to the message it preaches, and the doctrines it upholds, you can’t have the assurance that anybody looking up to the society is doing the right thing.

The society is not always right

Truthfully, most of the time, the society is wrong, but we pick up these wrong philosophies, and these ideas, and we run with it, trying to model our own lives after it.

It is sad to see how many lives have been ruined by trying to live according to the messages of the society.

Why do we allow the society to convince us that a lifestyle of drugs and alcohol is what defines our manliness and proves our competency, and that fun has to be synonymous with life threatening activities?

Why do we allow the society to convince us that some weights are beautiful than others? Why do we allow the society to lie to us that a certain type of weight is the definition of perfection?

And we embrace this lies, and run with it, plunging ourselves into turmoils of psychological pain, hating our bodies, trying to remodel it according the blue print of the society, and then what becomes the result?


Eating disorders and unhappiness. Bulimia, anorexia, and still not being able to find inner happiness because even the society can’t give us this inner happiness

Why do we allow the society to override the ancient teachings of the beauty in purity and dignity, and replace it with sexual experience as a means of harnessing self-value?

when did vulgarity become the pathway to confidence?

When did abusive relationships become a means of satisfying the inner desire for happiness and fulfillment?

Why do we allow the society to brainwash us into believing that steadfastness in the way of honesty, integrity, humility, and a peaceable life would only attract insults to us, and so we try to weave a life of pride and arrogance as a defense mechanism?

Why do we allow the society to convince us that picking on other people’s weaknesses is a way to levitate one’s self to higher grounds?

Why has the society convinced us that true leadership is about exploitation and selfishness, and not about servant hood, like it’s supposed to be?

And then I pause to look at the result of all this false teachings that we have attached our souls to

It starts with a gradual decline and degeneration, and before we can understand what is happening…

Depression, pain,  and sadness. We turn to liquor to drown our pain! We get addicted to empty things to find a way out of this darkness we have been plunged into, but this new addictions that were supposed to save us, only ushers into more deeper realms of darkness, and in no time,we become that lost soul.

We destroy ourselves and hurt our souls trying to gain some sort of control over our lives.


But then I think to myself.

None of this would have happened if we didn’t give the society more say over our lives than it was really supposed to have. If we didn’t substitute our conscience for that of the society.

I hate the society, I curse the society. I am mad with the society for doing this to us.

Well you could feel that way, but then, pause and think.

Who is the society?

The society is me and you. The society is us. The society is everyone. The society is that beggar on the street, and that celebrity on the stage.

We are the society.

The society is made up of souls like yours, souls who have their own battles to face. The society isn’t an unbeatable force; it is that person whose wrong opinions of the world, and of you, you let get to you.

It is a conglomeration of people, and then some people who use strong influence to introduce teachings that they think everyone should live by, even when they are bad teachings.

So why have you allowed yourself to be the victim of some peoples own teachings and ideas? Let us stop glorifying the society, and look at it for what it really is.

Lastly, here are fact that you should know:

  • Because a thousand people are doing something doesn’t make it right
  • The society can persuade, and push. But the society can’t control you against your will.
  • The society shouldn’t dictate your eternity to you.
  • peer pressure works both ways,

And to those out there still hanging on despite the pressures,

More strength to you. You’re also a voice in the society, speak out, beat the society, and be the society.

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  1. Someone had to tell what the truth is. Beautifully written. The fact that the way we think, eat, sleep or do any other activity is all dominated by the way “society” thinks. We do things based on it’s approval. We want to be one among them, no one wants to be an ugly duckling here. But we often forget to do what we want to do and not what the society wants us to.

    1. “No one wants to be the ugly duckling” Truth Sanah, you speak the truth. Maybe we should begin to realize that there are times when being the ugly duckling is most beneficial. Thanks for this thoughtful input Sanah

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